Holiday Reconciliations

18th November, 2010 - Posted by Colleen - No Comments

The Holidays are fast approaching, between the hustle and bustle of the World Series and trying to get that November Election ballot in, Holiday Season is creeping in fast. The stores have all their decorations up and the onslaught of sales paraphernalia have already been mailed out to fastidious buyers.

What sorts of feelings come about when you think of the Holidays? Perhaps there is a bit of stress and apprehension. Gatherings with families can bring with it a variety of mixed emotions and feelings. And with all the swiftness of time that carries no mercy, the festivities begin.

Good intentions collide with misunderstood comments driven by the stress of getting everything just right and tasting simply delicious. Old wounds are torn open and begin to bleed. This may sound dismal, but nevertheless, a reality to many every year. But there is hope.

The Family system can be likened to an infant’s hanging mobile: forever held together by one wire with a series of attachments, you can strike one character and the rest of the little participants move either violently or ever so slightly – either way, every single one is affected. Small changes can make a large impact. A change within one person can lead to a shift on the outside toward a loved one. That one piece of empathy toward a family member can shake the system so deeply that a domino effect of love and compassion can be felt throughout.

So, there are two ways to approach this holiday season, either armed with your ever so decorated shield or arrive with reconciliation in your heart which births words that flow from a simple faith.

“Therefore do not lose heart, but though our outer man is decaying, yet our inner man is being renewed day by day. For momentary light affliction is producing for us an eternal weight of glory far beyond all comparison while we look not at the things which are seen, but at the things which are not seen; for the things which are seen are temporal, but the things which are not seen are eternal.”
2 Corinthians 4:16-18

-Colleen Lam Nguyen, M.A., MFT Intern